Gore Verbinski’s first Pirates film is like the exact opposite of the Orson Welles gold standard Citizen Cane. Produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, based on a popular tourist attraction in Disneyland no less, and packed with enough stars to make the night sky jealous, The Curse of the Black Pearl is super ridiculous and super fun for everyone. And Johnny Depp gets to be British again, which is apparently as fun for him as it is for Hugh Laurie to pretend to be American. The plots focuses on Elizabeth Swan (Kiera Knightley) and the piece of pirate gold she jacked off a young Will Turner’s chest after he was fished out of Davy Jones’ Locker. Jump to ten years later, and a rabble of undead pirates have beached themselves outside her front door, and they want their treasure back. Meanwhile, Captain Jack Sparrow (there’s no need to try to measure Depp’s performance. Has he ever given a bad one?) is imprisoned for being a pirate, but he has the info that Will (prettiest of men, Orlando Bloom) needs to rescue his beloved Ms. Swan. It's swashbuckling, double crossing mayhem at its best. It’s a shame that the following two films, though entertaining, ended up plot twisting themselves into oblivion. Haters want to hate, and let them hate, but it doesn’t change the fact that the Pirates trilogy is good fun all around, and it all started with what could only be described as one giant commercial. Avast, ye advertising gods, and hold fast, for this maelstrom of marketability is set grow by one more. We’d better baton down those product placement hatches, for Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is due to make port in 2011.